My mind is a mess as it usually is. But some how there is a complete peace. One that I have not experienced for a very long time. In the mess that keeps swirling around me, my heart and mind are at rest. There is a joy that keeps bubbling from my heart.
Bit and pieces from recent Bible studies are popping in and out of my mind. Scripture is filling my thoughts and I am releasing all of that stuff that usually troubles my mind. It is an amazing place to be. And the one constant thing that fills my mind and my heart is You are Different Than This World. It is not a bad thing at all, it is actually a wonderful thing!
When we accept Jesus Christ into our lives, we are a new creation in Him. We leave our old life behind and pick up a new one. We are different from this world. God now rules our lives and His ways are our ways. We are new. We die to self and live for Him! It is an amazing transformation. One that will change us! And I am constantly reminded of this.
I have to say that I have let the routine of everyday fog my mind of this. It has clouded this new life. See the world tells us one thing, yet God tells me something else. Money is a hard issue for me, I seem to let it get a hold of me too tightly. However, today as I noticed just a silly mistake that I made, one that could have HUGE ramifications, I realized it does not matter. Holding this smiley little girl and teaching her how special she is, is my one responsibility. See, when I honor God and live my life for Him, I am rich beyond measure. I am not rich by world standard, but by God's. I have been experiencing this over and over lately and I am so filled with joy and love. This is what I am suppose to be doing. And it does not matter what the world says, this is what life is all about for me.
And it does not matter what the world thinks of Lydia, she was meant for our family. She has a purpose and she is changing people forever. God is using her in big powerful ways! I am blessed to be part of this amazing plan. The world says she is different, that she looks different, that she may never amount to half of what my other girls will. The world says that her live is not even valuable; that it is probably best to terminate. The world says that she will just bring you down and be a drain on you. The world says she is not worth much.
But God says she will change you. God says she is created perfectly without flaw. God says she matters and has a purpose and a plan. God says that she is no different than her other sisters. God says that she is fully able to carry out her plan. God says she is worth everything and more because she is Mine.
She is different than this world. She does look a little different than the other girls; just as Allison looks different than Ellen. She is slower than the other girls. She has not walked as early as them. However, she did teach Ellen and Allison what it means to never stop trying. She has taught them that despite her delays and medical complications, she is able. She may not have accomplished it when they did, but she has on her own time and she has taught a lesson that is valuable to our entire family and those around us.
When looking at her through selfish eyes, she can be looked at as a drain or a burden. But when looking at her through the eyes of God, she is so much more. While the effort is completely different with her than Ellen and Allison, so is the outcome. Yes, at times she requires more time and attention, more money and often times more of me than I would care to give; but the reward, the feeling of accomplishment, the joy, is far greater than anything I have ever experienced. I would give everything just to see her accomplish what it is that she has set out to accomplish. There is a journey with each of her accomplishments, a lesson, a value, a new characteristic that she teaches each time she achieves a milestone. I am blessed to say that I get to reap that reward.
The things in life that are so rewarding are things that cannot be bought, things that are not easy, and things that often times that are on a path that is not yet worn. And while we know these things, how come that decision is hard to make? How come we allow worldly things to influence our decisions and rob us of those unexpected blessings, of joy that will change us, of lessons that we need to learn?
Lydia is different and I am so happy! I am so proud of her because she is different. So when the world says she is different, I am encouraging myself to stand up and say "Yes she is, and I am proud of that!" Thankfully she is different and that different can remind me that I am different too. I am not of this world. I am of God. I am His. I have a new life in Him and I am not of this world. I am in this world to make an eternal difference. She is crafted from His Hand and she is different too (just as we all are).
Different...isn't it something that we all try to be at one point in time? Yet, it is something that causes such fear. When we are told that we will have a baby that is different, that is not like this world; we don't want to embrace that child, often times, we want to run. When our child is different and not like the others in the class, instead of educating and showing them what your child can do and focusing on their given abilities; we want to change them and make them more like the rest of them in their class. Different is good. Different does not mean bad. Maybe we have to change our dreams, but we don't ever have to give up on them. The path may be different than what we intended, but it always is different. If we allow ourselves to just be on the journey we are given, to take every moment and embrace it, we will never fail and never be disappointed. We can find great comfort in that.
As I am able to embrace this thought more and more, I am able to let the small stuff go and just be happy in that moment. I am able to keep my eyes on my Father and not focus on each step where it is easier to stumble. When I am able to be thankful for each step, each milestone and not focus on what she isn't doing, what she can't do I am filled with a joy that is unstoppable.